CoaP Presents: Campout
in the Woods
Radio Announcer: This just in! This
story takes place before a certain, stupid Wildcat ever came into play!
Neon: Someone shut that thing off!
Hyper: But Slipknot is up next!
Neon: Too bad! That frikkin radio
announcer is getting on my last nerve!
Hyper: Oh Alright! *Turns off the
radio* *Mumbles under his breath* Madame fortress mommy….
As usual, the main gang is on the
road. Neon’s at the wheel and Nuku’s up front. Everyone else in the back and is
as bored as hell.
Super: What’s with Neon? He’s
usually not THIS pissed off!
Zin: He’s just mad that he lost
the bet on where we’re going for our day off.
Chao Thing: I remember it like it
was just…. a flash back!
Chao Killer: Um, CT, it IS a
flashback!
CT: …Anyway…
*Flaaaaaaaaash baaaaack* <Insert
spooky music here>
Neon: Alright! If I win, we’ll
vacate at the nearest bar for the whole day!
Nuku: And if I win, we’ll campout
in the woods!
Hyper: *Cracks open a beer* Hey!
That’s the title of the story!
Nuku: Ready Neon?
Neon: Of course! ‘Cause I know I’m
gonna win!
*Nuku and Neon lock fists*
Nuku and Neon: One, two, three,
four! I declare a thumb war!
*Nuku and Neon start thumb
wrestling*
Super: They’re gonna be at it for
a while…
Nuku: *Pins Neon’s thumb* One,
two, three! Ha!
CK: Or Nuku will win after 10
seconds…
Neon: Hey! You cheated! Do-overs!!!!
Nuku: Too the woods we go!
Hyper:
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO*takes a
breath*OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
Zin: Shut up, Hyper.
*End Flashback*
Nuku: It’s not my fault Neon
happens to suck at thumb wrestling!
Neon: Do not! I just wasn’t ready!
Hmph…
Zin: *Looks out a window* Um…does
anyone notice where we are?
CT: Hmm….?
*The van is now 20,000 leagues
under the sea*
CK: HOLY CRAP!
CT: *Sighs* Flash backs’ll do that
to ya.
Super: Well someone think of
another flash back! Quick!
Radio Announcer: I remember when I
was a little boy Radio announcer…..
*Flaaaaaaaash baaaaack*
Young Radio Announcer: This just
in! ……Um…..I forget!
Bossdude: You’re fired!
*End Flashback*
Neon: I thought I said to turn
that thing off!
Hyper: *Looks out the window* Hey!
We’re back on the same road!
Zin: *Sarcastic* Joy…
Hyper: Not only that, but we’re
about to crash into a tree….Eh. *Downs another beer*
Everyone else but Neon and Hyper:
WHAT?!
*Neon tries to hit the breaks
to slow the van down, but ends up hitting the tree and makes it fall down. The
van, however, is unscathed*
Nuku: No! Not the tree! Not the
precious, life-giving tree! Oh Why?! WHYYYYY?!
Zin: Nuku, there’s a whole bunch
of other trees here…
Nuku: *Stops* I know. I’m just trying
to have a dramatic moment here. *Resumes* WHYYYYY?!
CT: Riiiiiight…
CK: Well, at least we’re here. And
there better be a chao garden somewhere here too!!!
Nuku: Can’t we just have a nice
little campout and not kill any chao for once?
CK: Lesse…..nope! We have a better
chance of Hyper going sober and dyeing than going a day without killing chao!
Hyper: And I never stop drinking!
Nuku: Fine…fine.
Neon: Let’s split up and set up
camp gang!
*The gang gets out of the van
and they take out their supplies*
Super: Neon, why do we need to
split up to set up camp?
Neon: *Sly look* ‘Cause I said so.
Super: That makes sense. *Takes
out his pikmin onions and summons out at least 100 pikmin* Come on guys! Let’s
set up camp!
*Super and the pikmin begin to
set up camp*
CK: I’m gonna find the chao garden here and kill every single chao I lay my eyes on. We’re gonna have a chao barbeque tonight!!!
CT: *Drooling* I’m looking forward
to that buddy! In fact, I’ll help!
*CK and CT head off*
Hyper: *Cracks open another beer* I’ll be in the van…eh…you know all the rest.
Nuku: I’ll get the firewood!
Neon: And I’ll just site here and…
Nuku: *Grabs Neon’s tail* Let’s go
Neon!
Neon: ACK! You ain’t the boss of
me!
*Nuku drags Neon off in a
different direction*
Zin: I might as well check the place out to see if there’s anything super dangerous. See ya guys later. *He heads off in yet another direction*
Hyper: I guess that leaves just us.
Super: And the pikmin and I finished setting up the tents!
Hyper: You know what that means…
Super and Hyper: BEEEEEER PAAAAAARRRTYYYYY!!!!!!
Pikmin: dfugudhukghbjijirdfsh! (Subtitles: Paaaaaaarrrrrtyyyy!)
*Super turns on some offspring music and the two
enchidnas have a beer party*
Meanwhile…where Zin is…
Zin: *Exploring* Man! I’m hungry! I wish CT hadn’t eaten all the cheese.
*Zin reaches a part of the woods that is really dark*
Zin: …….Well this sucks.
Coincidently, a fuchsia,
female wildcat decked out in skating gear and JSRF-esque clothes is exploring
another part of the dark woods that’s actually near where Zin is!
Wildcat: Yeesh! I can hardly see a thing in these woods!
Zin: I should turn on my flashlight so I can actually see something.
Wildcat: I should use my eyes as flashlights so I won’t feel like I’m blind in the woods.
*Zin turns on his flashlight at the same time the
Wildcat makes her eyes glow brighter. They find themselves standing only a few
feet away from each other*
Zin: YIKES!
Wildcat: WOAH!
*They both jump back in shock*
Wildcat: *Unsheathes her claws and gets into a fighting stance* Who are you and what are you doing here?!
Zin: *Pulls out a fire flower* That’s what I should be asking you!
Wildcat: Well that’s none of your business!
Zin: And what I’m doing is none of your business!
*They both stay in fighting stance for a minute or so*
Wildcat: *Gets out of Fighting stance* Wait…are you here with other people?
Zin: Um…yeah?
Wildcat: *A mischievious smile appears on her face* Thanks Raccoon boy! *She dashes off*
Zin: *Puts away the fire flower* Weeeeeird girl… *Smiles* She is kinda hot though. *Sighs* I might as well head back.
*Zin turns back and little does he know, the wildcat
is spying on him*
Wildcat: *Blushing* He said I was…hot… *Slaps herself to get back to reality and talks to herself* Get a hold of yourself girl! Focus on that you really want to do! ….If I follow that raccoon, I’ll find the other people he was talking about! *Grins evily* And then the fun begins…
*The Wildcat stealthily follows Zin*
Hyper: *Singing* Heeeeeeeeey *hic* Come out and plaaaaaaaay!!!!!!!
By now, everyone except Zin is
back at the campsite. Go figure.
Super: *Singing as well, something
completely different* It’s the end of the world *hic* as we know it! And I
feeeel *hic* fiiine!!!!!
Nuku: Why? Why can’t we have a normal
day off?
Neon: Cause I *hic* say so! And
you forced me to *hic* collect firewood!
CT: Green guy’s got a point!
Nuku: *Sweatdrops*
CK: We’re gonna have a kick@$$
barbeque tonight! Our main course is gonna be Hyper Sonic Chao!
HSC: *Tied up* You’ll never take
me alive! Never!
CK: *Looking eeeeeevil* You got
that right! ‘Cause you’ll be dead in a few minutes!
HSC: You’re a monster!
CK: *Looking proud with tears of
joy* I know!
CT: Can I eat him yet?!
CK: We gotta wait till Zin comes
back!
*Right after CK says that, Zin
finally shows up*
Hyper: There you are *hic* are! Have a *hic* beer!
Nuku: Oh Zin! Thank goodness
you’re safe!
CT: He’s here! Dinner
time!!!! *He starts eating all the
chao, including HSC*
Super: There goes that barbeque.
Neon: Besides, chao are only
edible to CT.
CK: Good point…
Nuku: Well, if there’s one thing I
know about camping out… *Dashes into the van and a few seconds later, comes out
with two big bags of food* …be prepared!
Zin: Well at least we won’t
starve.
*While all this is going on, the Wildcat from before is spying on everyone from a tree-branch*
Wildcat: Heh heh heh….Jackpot!
They’re all gonna experience the most annoying trip of their lives! *Snickers*
Nuku: Alright. I’ve got Cup Ramen,
burgers, chocolate, cherry pie…
Hyper: I like pie!!!
Nuku: I know. I was thinking of
you when I packed it. And finally, I have…
Hyper: BEER! *Holds up a can he
just cracked open*
Super: We already have beer dude.
Pikmin: ghfd. Hhhug. Bhhbff?
(Subtitles: Yep. Uh huh. What’s beer?)
Super: Oh, you guys can return to
your onions now.
*The pikmin do just that*
Nuku: What I was trying to say is,
Sprite! For those who want to stay sensible!
Neon: *Annoyed* Can we just have
the beer?
Nuku: And once again, I’m the only
one who wants to stay sober. More soda for me!
CT: When do we eat?
CK: You don’t get any cause you
already ate all the chao!
CT: Eh. Cheese and chao are the
only food I’m in the mood for right now anyway.
Nuku: Oh! I almost forgot! *Takes
out a whole bunch of cheese* I packed a lot of cheese as well!
CT: *Staring at the cheese* I must
have that beauty!!!
Zin: *Huuuuuuge grin* Nuku, did I
tell you that I love you?! *Dons the puppy dog eyes*
Nuku: *Sighs and gives Zin most of
the cheese* Just take it Zin…
Zin: *Holds the cheese and stares
at it with big anime eyes* THANK YOU CHEESUS!!!!!
Wildcat: *Spying* So it’s
dinnertime, eh? I have something that’ll spice things up! …Almost… *She quickly
starts crushing a whole bunch of jalapenos into a liquidy substance and pours
it into a bottle* Now I got it! Hmmmm, better disguise myself so that raccoon
won’t recognize me! *Wraps a red cloak around herself, takes off her helmet,
puts the hood of the cloak over her head, and sneaks over to the campsite*
CT: *Shifty eyebrows* Heeey Zin
old buddy…
Zin: Forget it CT! No cheese for
you! *Raspberries at CT*
CT: You will give me that cheese!
Zin: Never!
CT: Give me that cheese or I’ll…
Disguised Wildcat: *Interrupting*
Ahem…
CK: Well looky here. A mysterious,
cloaked person.
Neon: So what else is new?
DW (Disguised wildcat): *Deepens
her voice and squints her eyes to look and sound different* Good evening
gentlemen….and lady!
Hyper: You can’t have any beer!
It’s mine! *Protectively hugs his beer*
DW: Oh no, that’s not it at all my
friend. I want to…give you all something!
Super: Oh? Like what?
DW: Liiiiiiiiiiiiiike this! *Shows
the bottle of spicy sauce* It’s an exotic brand of super spicy sauce!
Guaranteed to spice up any food!!!!
Neon: Are you some kind of
soliciter?
Nuku: Why would there be a
soliciter in the middle of the woods?
CK: That’s just…annoying!
DW: *Grins* I’m a special kind of
soliciter! I will give this to you for absolutely free!
CT: Did that cloaked gal say…free?
Hyper: Forget it.
DW: What!? Why forget it?!
Hyper: ‘Cause it has no beer in it
ya moron!
DW: Um…..*To Super* Can I see your
beer for a minute?
Super: …Drink it and you die…
*Hands DW his beer*
DW: *Pours a bit of the beer into
the sauce bottle* Now it has beer in it! *Hands Super his beer back*
Hyper: *Grabs the sauce from DW*
Gimme that! *Pours some of the sauce into his beer* Sweeeeeet…..spicy beer with
beer sauce…..
Neon: Hey! Pass it over here!
*Grabs the sauce from Hyper and puts it into his beer*
Super: Hey! Gimme! That has MY
beer in it!!! *Swipes the sauce from Neon and pours some into his beer*
While the sauce is being “passed”
from person to person except Nuku, DW sneaks back to her hiding spot
Zin: *To DW* Hey!
DW: *Stops dead in her tracks* Uh
oh…
Zin: …Do I know you?
DW: Um…er…no! You must be
mistaking me for… some other wildcat! *Runs back to her hiding spot and takes
off her disguise*
Zin: …..Weeeeeird.
Hyper: Bottoms up!
*The Wildcat watches as the
guys down the “spicy” Beer*
Nuku: So, is it spicy like that girl said?
Neon: …It’s ok. Zesty, but not
hot.
Super: My beer still tastes like
beer.
CT: In other words, the sauce
isn’t spicy.
CK: What a waste of free stuff!!!
*Tosses the sauce bottle aside and it hits the wildcat on the head*
Wildcat: Ouch! *Rubs her head* I
don’t get it! How are they not annoyed by the spicyness of it?! They should be
breathing fire by now! *Tastes a tiny sample of the sauce from the bottle*
…It’s not spicy. Oh no! The beer I put in the last minute must have dumbed down
the spicyness of the sauce! Argh! Back to the drawing board…
CK: ……Y’know, after awhile, nature gets kinda boring.
Nuku: It’s not boring to me!
CK: Well that’s just you.
Zin: So whaddya all wanna do?
Super: Hmmm. Let’s party!
CT: But we partied a few minutes ago!
Super: So let’s do it again!
CT: Okie dokie!
CK: Now that’s what I’m talking about!
Neon: I’m the DJ and noone will tell me otherwise! *Takes music equipment out of thin air*
Zin: You’re always the DJ dude.
Neon: Duh! And noone will tell me otherwise! Now let’s party!!!
Hyper: ….Again! Nooch!
*Neon plays JSRF music (Don’t ask me which track) and
everyone parties…again…*
Nuku: Why not? At least we’re partying somewhere other than the van or the bar! *Starts dancing*
*All of the sudden, the Wildcat jumps into the party,
dancing a very stupid dance*
Wildcat: Heeeey! I’m Dancing like an idiot! Loooooooooooooooooooook! Loooooooooooooooooooook!
Neon: Hey random wandering person. Join the party!
Wildcat: Um, I was trying to crash your party. Aren’t you annoyed by it?
Neon: Whatever! Just do what I say!
Wildcat: Nevermind! *Stomps off*
Zin: *Didn’t see what just happened* What’s going on?
Neon: Oh. Some fuchsia colored cat wearing JSRF-esque clothes wanted to join the party, then she left.
Zin: Why does that description sound so familiar? Interesting…
Wildcat: *Back at her hiding place near the campsite* I must have been drunk to think of an idea that stupid! This is a total load of snickerdoodles! *A light bulb appears over her head* I got it! *Runs off*
Light bulb: How’d I get here! I must get back to Green man! *Runs away in a different direction*
CK: Who keeps saying “A few minutes later?”
Hyper: I know! It’s Cal imitating
George W. Bush! *Passes out*
Nuku: And that makes…2,000,000
times that Hyper has passed out. And that’s just this week!
Hyper: *Gets up* Wrong! 2,000,001
times! *Passes out again*
Nuku: Make that 2,000,002 times
this week.
Super: We must be very desperate
to do something if we’re counting how many times Hyper has passed out this
week.
Voice from afar: *Yelling*
SNICKERDOODLES!!!!
CT: Hey! An echo! Hello echo!!!
Voice from afar: *Yelling*
SNICKERDOODLES!!!!
CK: Ack! It’s the ghost of Hyper
Sonic Chao! Must…live up…to my name! *Takes out one of his BFGs and starts
shooting the sky*
Super: CK, do you really think HSC
sounds like a screaming girl?
Voice from afar: *Yelling*
SNICKERDOODLES!!!!
CK: …YES! *Resumes shooting the
air*
*Hyper Sonic Chao runs into the campsite. Wait. Wasn’t he killed earlier? I love plot devices…*
HSC: Hey! Did you guys hear that funny echo?
CK: There’s the ghost!
Zin: *Takes out the Super
poltergust 3000* Who ya gonna call?! *Starts sucking up HSC*
HSC: AAAAAAAAAH! What the heck do
you think you’re… *Gets sucked into the vacuum*
CK: Zin! I wanted to kill him!
Voice from afar: *Yelling*
SNICKERDOODLES!!!!
Nuku: It…wasn’t HSC guys…
Zin: …Whoops… *Switches the
poltergust in reverse and it spits out HSC…in pieces*
Neon: Not to mention he was alive
before he got killed again.
CK: And stay dead ya evil Ch-word!
*Shooting the corpse repeatively*
Wildcat (Who was the Voice from afar): *Yelling* SNICKERDOODLES!!!! *Grinning* Let’s see how annoyed they are nooow! *Skates all the way back to her hiding spot to spy on the guys and Nuku*
CT: So who was that echo anyway?
Super: Who cares?!
Wildcat: D’OH! *Slaps her
forehead* This is stupider than X-Box! *Another light bulb appears over her
head* Of course! Why didn’t I think of it sooner?! *Runs off again*
Light bulb: Not again! And I was
out on a date with Martini! *Runs away in a different direction*
Zin: Anyone wanna play a game?
Nuku: I know! Let’s play…
Voice from afar: *Yelling*
X-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOX!
Neon: *Weird expression on his
face* …….X-box………
CT: Looks like the echo said the
X-word!
Neon: X-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOX!!!!!!!
*Starts bouncing around like crazy*
Super: Hey everyone! Grab some pie
and watch Neon do the X-box dance!
Hyper: *Immediately gets up*
PIE!!! *Swipes the cherry pie mentioned earlier and eats it while the rest
watch Neon bouncing around*
Wildcat (Who was the Voice from afar): *Yelling* X-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOX! *Grins even more* This one has to work! *Skates all the way back to her hiding spot again to spy on the guys and Nuku*
CK: Huzzah! Look at Neon go!
CT: Betcha 5 beers and a block of cheese that he’ll still be at it for the next hour!
CK: You’re on!
Hyper: *Baby got back music playing in the BG* I like pie and I cannot lie! You other brothers can’t deny!!!
Nuku: *Giggling*
Zin and Super: *Just plain laughing their @$$es off*
Wildcat: *Sweatdrop* They’re…actually…happy?! NOOOOOOO! They’re supposed to be annoyed! What’s wrong with these people?! *Calms down* Well, this only means one thing. It’s time for… OPERATION: ANNOY THE LIVING CRAP OUT OF EVERYONE! PLAN-X!!!! *Spooky music plays*
Zin: *Stops laughing* Did you all just hear a familiar voice and some spooky music just now?
Wildcat: *Slaps her forehead* D’oh! I mean…*Whispers* Operation: Annoy the living crap out of everyone! Plan-X! *Spooky music plays* …Cut it out! *Music slows down and stops* The fun will begin when everyone’s in dream land…
A few hours later…
CK: Y’know, I’m not even gonna ask about who’s doing that minute thingy anymore.
Hyper: I’m telling you! It’s Cal
imitating Bill Clinton! *Passes out again*
Nuku: Didn’t he say George W. Bush
the last time?
Super: Nooo… I think he said Al
Gore.
CK: Or maybe it was Dan Quail.
CT: You’re all wrong! He said
Milliard Fillmore!
Neon: Milliard Fillmore, CT? He
said, Professor K. And I’m always right!
Zin: Well not this time! I’m
pretty sure he said Osama Bin Laden!
Super, CK, CT, Nuku, and Neon:
OSAMA BIN LADEN?!
*The gang except Hyper, get into an argument about political leaders while the wildcat, again, sneaks into the campsite*
Wildcat: Phase 1: Put sleeping
potion into everyone’s beers…and soda, without getting caught. I only have one
chance, so I must not mess this up blah blah blah… *Starts putting drops of
sleeping potion into everyone’s drinks*
Nuku: *Stops fighting* You know,
why the heck are we fighting about world leaders and political presidents? This
is just pointless!
Neon: So is this story.
Zin: You both read my mind! This
whole thing is D-U-M DUMB!
Hyper: *Gets up* Letter B forgot
you did! *Passes out again*
Zin: *Like Mario in SSBM* D’OH!
CK: All this fighting and
letter-forgetting is making me thirsty.
Super: To the beers!
Nuku: …And Soda!
CT: Whatever!
*The gang heads over to the
van*
Wildcat: *Notes the gang coming*
Gasp! *Runs back to her hiding spot*
Neon: Here’s to pointlessness. And
JSRF…
CK: …To Chao killing…
CT: …And eating Chao…
Super: …To fun with you Pikmin…
Zin: And…
Hyper: *Gets up again* …Melee is
fun…*Passes out again*
Zin: MELEE!!!!!
Nuku: …And to having common sense!
*The gang picks up their drinks
and clink them*
Wildcat: Here it comes…
*They down the drinks, and a
few seconds later, they all conk out*
Wildcat: SUCCESS! Phase 1 accomplished! Time for phase 2! *Runs back into the campsite and steps towards Zin* *Blushes* …Ok…try and get through this…don’t let your feelings get the best of you! Here we go!
*The Wildcat commences with phase 2…whatever that is. The scene fades to black. Iza and Mecha Sonic JSG walk infront of the black screen*
Iza: Um…hello there. Mecha and I have a question about the story.
Mecha: Why the hell aren’t we in
it?!
*The Wildcat appears as well*
Wildcat: Um…Hey Mecha? Who’s tending the bar of heaven?
Mecha: …Aw crap! I gotta get back
to my bar!!! *Jets off*
Iza: What about me, girl?
Wildcat: You’ll see!
*Iza looks very confused as they walk off. The scene goes back to normal and it’s now morning*
Neon: *Regains consciousness* Ugh…I feel like I have been tranquilized. *Looks around to see that everyone else is still unconscious, and that there is something “Weird” about them* …Oh…my…*Starts chuckling* They’re…they’re… *Falls over laughing*
CK: *Wakes up* Gah…Neon, do ya
have to laugh so loud?
Neon: *In between snickers* Yes!
Oh god! Yes! Just look at you! *Resumes laughing*
CK: *Looks down at himself to see
that he’s wearing all of Nuku’s clothes!* *Freaked out expression*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!
*CK’s screaming wakes up Nuku, Zin, Super, and the Wildcat, who instantly starts spying on them again*
Super: There’s a wake-up
call I don’t enjoy hearing… *Rubs his head*
Zin: Yeah… *Looks at
Super* Knuckles? What are you doing here?
Super: Knuckles?! Whatcha
talking about! I’m Super Knux! *Sees that his hat, pants, and shades are gone*
Hey! Where are my clothes?!
*Just then, Hyper gets up from getting up and passing out last night*
Hyper: *In an Ed-like
voice* I feel funny…
Super: *Looks at Hyper*
Um…Hyper? Why in the blue pikmin are you wearing my clothes?
Hyper: Nooch? *Looks at
himself* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
I’ve went down to my
super form! I MUST DRINK MORE BEER!!!! *Runs into the van and quickly gets into
the big ol’ beer stash*
Super: You’re not in your
super form! You’re wearing my clothes! *Goes after Hyper*
Nuku: Well…this is odd.
Zin: *Staring at Nuku*
Nuku: What’s with you?
Zin: *Grins and imitates
a little kid’s voice* Eeeeeeeeeew! You’re nekkid!
Nuku: *Looks at herself*
Aieeee! I’m nakey!!! *Whips out a huge, black bar with the word, “Censored” on
it, and puts it where her dress should be* Hey! Where’s your hat, Zinny-the-pooh?
Zin: What?! *Feels the
top of his head to find out that his hat is indeed, gone* ACK! Who took my
favorite Zinio hat?! And…did you just call me Zinny-the-pooh?
*Zin and Nuku see Zin’s hat floating in mid-air*
Zin’s hat?:
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwnnnnnnnn…..
Nuku: AAAAAAH! It’s a
demon hat!
Zin’s hat?: What’re you
talking about? *An arm pops out from inside the hat, and the arm lifts it up to
reveal CT* It’s just me! In all my blobness!
Zin: Hey! You stole my
hat!
CT: Hey! I don’t know how
your hat got on me!
Zin: Liar Liar Cheese on
fire! Give it back! *Pounces on CT*
CT: Oh, is that how you
wanna play?! Fine! *Transforms into his super form and fights back*
Nuku: Oh my god!
CK: *Points at Nuku* You!
You turned me into a girl!
Nuku: *Turns to face CK*
What are you talking… *Notes that CK is wearing all of her clothes* You stole
my clothes! Why you…
CK: I didn’t steal
anything! You turned me into a girl!
Nuku: Did not!
CK: Did too!
Nuku: Did not!
CK: Did too!
*CK and Nuku get into a classic did not did too argument while Neon, all the while, is laughing his @$$ off*
Neon:
Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!
Super: *From the van*
Hey! How come nothing’s wrong with you, Neon?!
Hyper: *Chugging down
beer after beer* Must…get…Hyper…again!
CT: Neon must have been
the one who did this!
Neon: *Between laughs* No
way! I just woke up!
Nuku: Liar liar…
Zin: *Finishes what Nuku
was saying* …Cheese on fire!
CK: So you think giving
me a sex change is funny, eh?
*The gang, except Hyper,
gangs up on Neon, and a huge fight ensues. The Wildcat, who was spying on them
again, is laughing so hard, she’s crying*
Wildcat: *Laughing her
@$$ off* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! It worked! It Worked! Operation: Annoy
the living crap out of everyone, plan X worked! They’ll be at it for hours!
Five minutes later…
*Everyone is back to normal*
Hyper: Snoochie
Boochies! I’m Hyper again!
Super: You were hyper to
begin with, dude.
CT: *Back in his blob
form* Well, that was some trip.
Neon: *Looking proud of
himself* Good thing I suggested that everyone just put their own clothes back
on.
Nuku: The Ego rises
again.
Wildcat: *Shocked*
No…This can’t be! They’re…they’re…not annoyed anymore! NOOOO! This isn’t fair!
This just isn’t fair! None of my plans work on these guys! …There’s only one
thing I can do now… *Hangs her head in shame and at the same time she does it,
a bell gongs*
Zin: Well, after all
that, it looks like we finally have a mystery.
CK: …On our day off…
Nuku: Woohoo! Anyway, who
would do such a thing?
Wildcat: I would!
Zin: That voice!
*The gang sees the wildcat jump off a tree-branch, revealing herself*
Zin: Hey! You’re that
girl from yesterday!
Everyone but Zin and the
Wildcat: Huh?
Zin: That girl is the
same one I encountered when I was exploring the woods yesterday!
Wildcat: He’s right. We
sorta “met” yesterday and I asked him if he was with other people and he said
yes. When he left, I followed him stealthily and that’s how I found the rest of
ya.
Neon: Who are you?
CT: And what do you want
with us?
Wildcat: My name…is Kotochawan
(Koto for short) Mystic Fire, but you can just call me Mystic. And I was trying
to annoy the living s**t out of yall.
Nuku: Why would you do
something so stupid like that onpurpose?
Mystic: That’s for me to
know and you to find out. And just so you know, I was the soliciter, the stupid
dancer, the voice from afar that yelled Snickerdoodles, and…the x-word, and I
was the one who swapped all of your clothes.
Hyper: I knew it! *Cracks
open another beer*
CK: No you didn’t.
Mystic: Now I have a
question for all of you! How can you all be not annoyed by all of the stupid
and moronic things I did?!
Neon: Well, before you
told us all this, we didn’t know you were behind it all, so there was no way we
could be annoyed by you specifically.
Super: And with all the
stuff we go through everyday, someone yelling Snickerpoodles, or whatever, is
the least of our problems.
Mystic: It’s
SNICKERDOODLES! Not SNICKERPOODLES! Anyway, it won’t annoy you, even a little,
if I yell snickerdoodles at the top of my lungs, really loud?
Zin: No. Not really.
Mystic: Well, How ‘bout
now?! *Takes a deep breath*
The scene shifts to a peaceful
part of the woods, but you can still hear everything going on in the other part
of the woods
Mystic: *Yelling really
loud* SNIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICKEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOODLLLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We now go back to the gang and
Mystic. Mystic is breathing hard from her super loud scream
Zin: No. Not really.
Mystic: *Looking at Zin*
…I hate you.
Zin: Well good for you! I
hate everything!
Mystic: You are
impossible!
Zin: *Smiling* I know.
Mystic: Are you mocking
me?!
Zin: *Points at Mystic*
Are YOU mocking me?!
Mystic: Am I annoying
you?
Zin: No. Am I annoying
you?
Mystic: YES YOU ARE!
Zin: Splendid.
Nuku: Guys! STOP! This
isn’t anyway to greet a new friend!
Mystic: …Friend? You
consider me a friend…even after all the moronic things I did to yall?
Nuku: Well, you don’t
seem evil to me. You’re more…more…
CK: …Insane.
CT: Like us!
CK: Not to mention your
weirdo pranks made this camping trip sound interesting. I never saw Neon bounce
that long before!
Neon: Hehe…Bouncy bouncy!
Mystic: *Thinking* These
guys LIKE me for my pranks?
Nuku: And since you
introduced yourself to us, we should do the same for you. I’m Nuku Nuku cat.
*Shakes Mystic’s hand*
Super: I be Super Knux.
Word.
Hyper: My Hyper is name
Knux. Beer have you. *Hands Mystic a beer*
Mystic: Um…you keep it.
*Hands the beer back to Hyper*
Hyper: Dokie Okie!
*Drinks the beer in one second flat*
CK: I’m your friendly
neighborhood Chao Killer named…well…Chao Killer! Hmmm…maybe I should kill
another…
CT: I’m Chao Thing! And
instead of killing chao, I eat ‘em! And they taste really good with
cheeeeeeeese… *Takes out a block of cheese and eats it whole*
Neon: I….am Neon Chaos!
*Glares at Mystic* Feed my ego….FEED IT I SAY!
Mystic: Sure thing, Ego
Head!
Neon: *Sweatdrops* This
is gonna be harder than I thought.
Zin: *Sighs* ….Zin.
Mystic: Nice to
meecha…ZIM!
Zin: Yeah, whatever.
Mystic: Rats! I thought I
had you that time!
Zin: Oh you’ll never
annoy me, babe…
Mystic: * Blushes* Huh?
*Snaps out of it* You guys are pretty cool!
Neon: And…
Nuku: And thanks for the
compliment Mystic!
Super: *Recalling back to
a few minutes after the clothes swap* Well, that was our shortest mystery ever.
Hyper: No! This is our
shortest mystery ever! *Takes out two beer cans*
Hyper as Beer can #1: Who
dunnit?
Hyper as Beer can #2:
Some guy.
HABC#1: Oh ok. Wanna get
drunk?
HABC#2: Hell yeah!
Hyper: I’ll drink ya
both! *Drinks both beers at once*
Super: Hey, that IS the
shortest mystery ever!
Mystic: *Laughs* Well, I
might as well go. I have a world to explore! See yall another day! *Starts to
walk off*
Nuku: Wait!
*Mystic turns her head to
the gang and stops walking*
Nuku: Why don’t you come
with us? We travel the word too! …In a
van. *Gestures to the SoaH machine*
Zin: Hmm…We could use
another girl. *Smiles*
Neon: Hey! Don’t I get a
say in this?! I’m the leader, god damnit!
Mystic: *Blushes* You
want me to… *Looks at Nuku and then looks at the guys. She begins to blush
heavily, looking like she’s about to collapse* *Talking really fast*
Thenagain,Idon’twannawearoutmywelcome.AndI’msurewe’llmeetagainifwealltravelaroundtheworld!Nicetomeetyall!Anduntilourpathscrossagain,SAYONARA!!!!!
*Quickly skates off and after a second or two, she’s nowhere in site*
Hyper: *Waving a beer
around as a goodbye* Snoogans! Snochie Bochies! NAGA NAGA NOOOOOOOOOOOOCH!!!!
CT: Well, that was fun.
Kinda.
Zin: Who’s up for getting
outta here?!
*Everyone raises their hand except Nuku*
CK: We gotta get to a
bar! We need to make up for lost time!
Hyper:
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA*Takes a
breath*AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
Nuku: Oh no.
Neon: Oh yes! Now let’s
get outta here!
Super: But we need to
gather up all our camping stuff!
CK: That’s easy! Take it,
minute guy!
One hour later, at the bar of
heaven
Hyper: *Standing on the
bar table and rapping* I like Pie and I cannot lie! You other brothas can’t
deny!
Super: *Joining in* And
when a slice walks in with an itty bitty crust and a filling in your face you
get…
Hyper: Hey! That’s not
how it goes! Here’s how it really goes…
Mecha: So what happened
yesterday? I was wondering why you all weren’t here that day.
Neon: We went on a
camping trip because I lost a thumb war against Nuku.
CK: And this minute guy
kept speeding up time.
Zin: And there was this
girl who tried to annoy us, but I charmed her into liking us.
Nuku: *Sipping on a
Sprite* Ahem…
Zin: Oh. And Nuku and the
rest helped too.
Nuku: Muuuuuch better.
Mecha: I wonder if I’ll
see this girl?
Radio Announcer: We
interrupt “Baby Got Pie” by Sir Knux-A lot to report that you’ll probably see
that stupid Wildcat again because she might be in future CoaP stories!
CT: Oh Thanks for
spoiling it! …Jerk.
Mecha: Well, at least I
know.
Zin: Me too. *Smiles*
Meanwhile, Mystic is in SoaH city
and she’s…exploring it! What didja expect?
Voice: Mystic!
Mystic: *Looks back* Oh
hi Iza! What’s up?
Iza: Hey girl! I got a
lot of new clothes at the mall nearby! *Shows her bags of clothes* What have
you been doing?
Mystic: Well, I tried to
annoy a group of people in the woods yesterday.
Iza: Did you annoy them?
Mystic: I made friends
with them…*Makes a ^^;; face*
Iza: Cool! Can you
introduce me to your new friends sometime?
Mystic: If I ever see
their van again…
*The girls walk until they see a huge bar infront of them. The SoaH machine is parked next to the curve*
Mystic: Hey Iza, you said
you wanted to meet my new friends?
Iza: Yeah!
Mystic: *Grabs Iza’s
hand* Then TOO THAT BAR!
Iza: AAH! Mystic! You’re
hurting me!
*Mystic and Iza run toward the Bar of Heaven as the scene fades to black. Cal walks infront of the Black screen*
Cal: …This story is
brought to you by the campaign of none other than…VOTE FOR CAL!
*Some campaign music plays in the background*
Vocals of the music:
*Singing* Vote for Cal! He can make soda out of anything!
Cal: So true…So true…
*The End appears on the screen*
Cal: No! No! Don’t end it
yet! I still have my election speech to make!
*The screen fades to black again and takes Cal with it*
The End! (Sorry, Cal…)