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Today in the warehouse, Shuki is bored with beating the AI at Tekken and is trying to convince Dawginson, who is eating bacon, to play against her.
Shuki: C’mon Dawg, play Tekken with me! What, are you scared you’ll lose to a girl?
Dawginson: Mainly I just don’t want to have to stop eating this bacon.
Shuki: Well how about when you finish it?
Dawginson: I wish I could but I have plans.
Shuki: What plans?
Dawginson: Make more bacon.
Shuki:…when was the last time you ate something that wasn’t bacon?
Dawginson: I had some bread just earlier today!
Shuki: You mean when you had a bacon sandwich.
Dawginson: That’s not entirely bacon!
Shuki: Ugh, I’m so bored. There’s never anything to do around here. Where the hell are the other guys?
Cut to a giant carnival. All the rest of the gang are there. Loads of rides and shiny lights are everywhere and happy carnival music is playing.
Hedj: I can’t believe everything at this carnival is totally free! What could be better than free candy floss?
Hyper runs across the field in the background holding several bottles of beer.
Hyper: Woooooo! I love this carnival!
Darth: Holy crap, free beer? I’m gonna go…I might not be back for a few weeks.
Ego God: Heh. You’re right Hedj this is great fun. Still it seems like we forgot someone…
Back to the warehouse.
Dawginson: I think they said something about going out somewhere, but I was concentrating on eating bacon. Or maybe I was cooking bacon at that point. I’m trying to cut down on that.
Shuki: You’re cutting down on bacon?
Dawginson: Nah I’m just cutting down on cooking it. I need to get someone else to make it for me.
Just then Hyper bursts in through the door, soaking wet, carrying several bottles of beer. He shortly collapses on the floor, barely conscious.
Hyper: Wheeeee!
Shuki: Jesus. What the hell? Hyper, are you drunk?
Dawginson: It would probably be more surprising if he was sober.
Shuki: Yeah you’re right. Man it’s so boring around here today. I wish there was something to do.
Dawginson: Yeah I know what you mean. Say Hyper, You wanna try to build a fort out of bacon?
Hyper: Woooo bacon!
Dawginson: Awesome. Y’know Hyper, I think you must be the best sidekick I’ve ever had.
Just then Hinky floats in the door, which Hyper left open.
Hinky: Who’s what now?
Dawginson: Uhhh…I was just saying how much I miss Hinky because he’s the best sidekick I’ve ever had!
Hinky: What are you talking about? I’m your mentor not your sidekick.
Dawginson: Of course. That’s why I agreed to watch while you make a bacon fort for us.
Hinky: You did? Oh…I mean, yeah, that’s right!
Dawginson: Start in the kitchen. Hyper, go help him.
Hinky and Hyper go into the kitchen.
Dawginson: Y’know today really doesn’t seem that boring to me.
Shuki: Simple things please simple minds.
Dawginson: I do not have a simple mind.
Hyper: Hey Dawg! Check it out, there’s a really shiny coin on the floor in here!
Dawginson: Shiny?! How shiny? I wanna see!
Shuki: *sigh* I’d better go look for the others. That bacon fort is going to end up with something exploding.
Later that day, inside a big fort made of bacon.
Dawginson: Awesome we did it.
Hinky: We sure did. …now what?
Dawginson: Uhh I dunno. Why did you come over here again?
Hinky: Oh that’s right! I was going to plant a bomb in your basement.
Hyper: Wooo bomb!
Dawginson: Yeah aweso- wait, what?
Hinky: Whoops! Did I say bomb? I meant I’m going to go into the basement and uh…cook some more bacon. Y’know to build a moat for the bacon fort.
Dawginson: Oh, okay then.
Hyper: Wooo moat!
Dawginson: Seriously, how much beer have you have?
Hyper: Woo beer!
Dawginson: I see. Well I’m going back to the main room.
Dawginson leaves. Hyper looks at the huge walls of bacon surrounding him, then does shifty eyes. He quickly grabs a piece of bacon out of one of the walls and eats it. Then he does shifty eyes again.
Cut back to the main room. The rest of the gang arrive home, minus Darth.
Shuki: Quick guys, we have to stop them from building a bacon fort. That thing’ll make a mess all over the kitchen and it’ll never hold. I just – oh crap, Dawginson’s back in here already. They must have finished it!
Ego God: Dammit! Quick, lets go!
Everyone runs into the kitchen, then back again.
Ego God: Well nice job Shuki. That was worth leaving the best carnival ever for.
Shuki: But-
Ego God: Hinky is here?
Dawginson: Yeah, he said we was…oh my God I think he’s planting a bomb in the basement!
Ego God: Quick, to the basement!
Hedj: Wait, if there’s a bomb in there why are we-
Dawginson: There’s no time to lose!
Cut to a dark room. There is a cloaked figure standing in the shadows. Hinky is speaking to the figure.
Hinky: I’ve done it master. You won’t hear from the CoaP gang anymore. They’ll be dead within minutes.
Cut to the basement. The gang walk down slowly.
Ego God: Well I don’t see any- wait a second.
Shuki: What?
Ego God: It’s…it’s…oh my God! This place stinks!
Dawginson: *sniff* Oh dude! That’s gross! It’s like 5 of Hyper’s farts combined!
Ego God: Look on the floor! Somebody set off a stink bomb in here!
Dawginson: Well I guess whoever told Hinky to plant that bomb didn’t tell him what type of bomb.
Ego God: Yep I guess so. Let’s all go back upstairs so the smell is trapped down here. At least we have a nice clean smelling house upstairs.
A loud fart from upstairs shakes the entire basement.
Hyper: Wooo farts!
Ego God: Maybe we should go outside and do something.