 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
 |
It was just another day at the CoaP Warehouse. Neon, Zin and Hyper could all be found sitting around on the couch in the living room watching TV.
Hyper: Argh I’m getting sick of all the election crap on TV.
Neon: You think it’s bad now wait until the Fall, it only gets worse then.
Hyper: Yawn… I’m glad they only do this crap every eight years.
Zin: Um actually it’s every four years dude.
Hyper: What? Then why the heck were the last two presidents in office so long?
Zin: Because they were re-elected dumb ass.
Hyper: Really? You mean Bush actually won twice? You think people would have learned their lesson.
Neon: Yeah considering how many people complain about how bad of a President he is it really makes you wonder how he won again.
As the guys talk the couch they are sitting on suddenly flips backwards and they all fall through a trap door that opened behind it. Meanwhile SuperKnux walks into the room just in time to see them falling through the floor and hears then yelling as the floor closes back up and the couch returns to it’s normal position.
Super: What the hell?
Just then Nuku and Chao Killer come walking into the room.
Chao Killer: Super what the hell are doing in here?
Nuku: Yeah we heard yelling and a loud noise.
Super: Hey I just walked in here minding my own business when I saw the couch flip backwards and drop Zin, Neon and Hyper through a hole in the floor!
Chao Killer and Nuku pause and stare at him for a moment.
CK and Nuku: Super, you idiot!
Super: What!? It’s what happen! I swear!
Nuku: Uh huh… I’m sure the ground just opened up and swallowed the other guys whole.
Chao Killer: Yeah dude, stop making crap up and try to keep quiet.
Super: Man…
The screen then fades to black and we cut to a different area as Neon, Zin and Hyper come flying out of long tunnel and crash onto the ground below.
Hyper: Wooo! Again!
Zin: Argh… what the hell just happen Neon!?
Neon: Hey don’t ask me, I have no idea what’s going on! Though this place looks kind of familiar…
The gang all take a look around the large room they just landed in, it’s a high tech looking area and suddenly a large Monitor turns it’s self on and someone’s face appears on it.
Sonic Adventurer: Welcome Agents!
Zin: Agents? What the hell is going on?
Neon: Hey that’s Sonic Adventurer… I think I’m starting to remember what this place is.
Hyper: Is it the bathroom? Cause I need to go.
Sonic Adventurer: Don’t tell me you guys forgot that your spies!
Zin: Spies… ah now I remember. Crap man it’s been like three years.
Neon: Yeah… I completely forgot about this all.
Hyper: Hey who’s the guy on the TV?
Sonic Adventurer: Enough Agents, I know it’s been a while but I have a mission for you three. The President has been kidnapped by Ninjas. Are you bad enough dudes to rescue him?
The guys all pause for a few minutes.
Hyper: That sounds boring, I’d rather go get drunk.
Sonic Adventurer: You can get drunk another day Agent Triple Six! Right now the President is in danger!
Hyper: But aren’t we getting a new President soon anyway?
Neon: Hyper’s right, I doubt things could possibly get any worse.
Zin: Meh, if they’re out then so am I.
Sonic Adventurer: Your kidding right?
Neon: Nope, now come on guys let’s get out of here.
Sonic Adventurer: Wait! Get back here damn it!
Sonic Adventurer yells at the guys as they walk away and return to the upper areas of the warehouse, the screen fades to black and we skip ahead to a week later. The gang are all sitting around in the living room watching TV, the image of a news reporter is seen.
TV: Half the country was wiped out today after a series of massive nuclear explosions. The entire country is now in chaos and it’s just a matter of time until…
Hyper: Boring! Change the channel.
Super: Why are we watching the sci-fi channel anyway?
CK: Well I guess this is better then the real news at least. All they’re talking about is the President being missing.
Nuku: Yeah someone should really figure out where the President is.
Hyper: Maybe like a secret group of agents could do it?
Zin slaps Hyper.
Zin: Shut up dude.
Nuku: What was that about?
Hyper: Yeah dude what the hell?
Zin: Uh… I don’t know?
And so the gang continued watching TV while the screen fades out and our story ends… wait no that’s not right. Instead we cut to later on with Neon, Zin and Hyper in the SoaH Machine.
Neon: Nice going Hyper, you almost blew our cover back there in the living room.
Zin: Yeah dude the rest of the gang can’t find out were spies… even if we haven’t really done any spy type things in over three years.
Hyper: Ah so that’s why Zin slapped me. Say were are we going anyway? Did we decide to save the President after all or something?
Neon: No were just on a beer run.
Hyper: Woo sweet!
Zin: Yeah even if we had changed our mind we have no idea where Bush is.
Hyper: Well I heard some women have bush between they’re legs.
Zin: Wrong kind of bush stupid!
Just then as the van is passing under a bridge the road opens up below them and van goes down into a hidden tunnel.
Hyper: Ahhhh earthquake! Were falling underground!
Neon: Calm down Hyper! There isn’t an earthquake…
Zin: I think I know what’s going on here guys…
The van comes to a stop in a high-tech looking room similar to the one under the warehouse. Just then a large TV comes on displaying Sonic Adventurer.
Sonic Adventurer: Welcome agents.
Neon: How many of these places did you build?
Sonic Adventurer: That’s not of your concern, what is of your concern is that we have located where president Bush is being held and I am recommending you change your mind about taking this mission.
Zin: Yeah where is he?
Sonic Adventurer: He is being held in West Chester Pennsylvania.
Hyper: Hey that’s where Bam Margera lives. Hey guys maybe the CKY crew kidnapped him as a joke.
Sonic Adventurer: Don’t be ridicules agent Triple Six, your arch nemesis Dr. Shadow is no doubt responsible for this.
Zin: Dr. Shadow!? I’ll kill that bastard!
Neon: Wait wait do you have proof it’s Dr. Shadow though?
Sonic Adventurer: No but who else would do it?
Hyper: I still say it was Bam.
Sonic Adventurer: Enough already, I need to know if you’ll accept the mission.
Zin: If there is a possibility I’ll get to kick Dr. Shadow’s ass then I’m in.
Neon: I guess so, I wouldn’t mind getting to wear our flashy spy suits again.
Hyper: Can I have my beer hat?
Sonic Adventurer: Uhhh sure.
Hyper: Then I’m in!
Sonic Adventurer: Then it’s settled! Good luck agents!
The TV screen goes blank and the guys suddenly find the SoaH Machine being launched back up onto the highway.
Zin: Hey were back on the highway.
Neon: Wow that was convenient. Well I guess we should get going agents.
Hyper: Woo! Commence operation find Bam!
We now cut to several hours later with the guys still in the SoaH Machine but now with frilly spy outfits on. They have now entered West Chester Pennsylvania.
Neon: Good thing the SoaH Machine has a GPS or I would have never found the city.
Zin: You think that guy who gave us orders could have given us something like a jet or some kind of super awesome spy vehicle. Guess he spent all his money building underground bases with big screen TVs.
Neon: Yeah I am a bit disappointed, at least we got our old outfits.
Zin: Yeah… though now that were in West Chester how the hell do we find the president.
Hyper: Shouldn’t be too hard, Castle Bam is located on a 14 acre lot.
Neon: Damn it Hyper I don’t think Bam Margera kidnapped the president!
Hyper: Well would it hurt to at least look?
Neon: I guess not… how exactly do we find Castle Bam though?
Hyper: I think it’s in Wawaset, which is right outside of West Chester.
Neon: Ok then I guess I can just enter that into the GPS. What street are we on now?
They look for the street signs.
Zin: Hahaha were on GAY street!
Hyper: Hahaha that’s great!
Neon: Yeah… what a stupid street name. Anyway the GPS is telling me to make a right.
Hyper: Well of course you’ll have to make a right, you certainly can’t go straight on GAY street!
The guys all laugh as they continue driving.
Zin: Good one dude.
And so the spies begin to make their way to Castle Bam after getting off of Gay Street (which by the way really exists, I’ve been there) and the screen fades as we briefly cut back to the warehouse to see Zin and Nuku playing Super Smash Bros. Brawl as Super watches while eating nachos.
Super: Damn it when are the guys getting back with the beer? I need beer to go with my nachos!
Zin: Yeah they left hours ago, I’m going to be pissed if they stopped at a bar without us.
Nuku: Be patient guys, I’m sure they’ll be back soon.
Super: They better be!
And then the screen fades yet again and we cut back to agent’s Neon, Zin and Triple Six as they pull up to Castle Bam.
Neon: We found it agents!
Hyper: Look and there’s the President!
Hyper points to a guy wearing a suit with a skate boarding helmet on and knee pads and elbow pads. He’s seen skating at Castle Bam’s skate park.
Zin: Don’t be stupid Hyper…. Wait that is the President. What the hell?
Bush: Greetings my fellow Americans. You come to skate too?
Neon: Why are you here skate boarding? I thought you were kidnapped by ninjas?
Bush: That was just a ruse so I could take a break from my duties as president. I’ve always loved skate boarding but they never let me build a skate park at the White House! I so envy Bam Margera, after my term runs out I think I need to invest in a Castle Bush. Yup that sure would be great.
Hyper: Huh huh duties…
Zin: Speaking of Bam where he is?
Just then Bam Margera and Ryan Dunn come walking up to them.
Bam: Damn it George Bush! I thought I told you get off my property!
Dunn: Next thing you know some Secret Service guys will come and trash the place trying to take you back to the White House.
Bam: Yeah man and only me and my crew are allowed to trash my place!
Hyper: Hey guys it’s Bam Margera and the guy who stuck the toy car up his ass!
Neon: Awesome!
Dunn: My names Ryan Dunn, who the hell are you guys?
Zin: Were a group of Secret Agents sent to find the President and take him back to the White House.
Dunn: Damn it I knew this would happen!
Neon: Well we didn’t have any plans on trashing the place.
Bam: Well that’s good, now get this guy out of here. Were going to start filming my next series soon, Hasta la Bam.
Hyper: Ok but could we have some beer.
Bam: Yeah sure, why not.
Zin: Awesome we’ll just lock the President in our van for time being while we party.
Neon: Good idea agent Zin!
Bush: Don’t I have a say in this? After all I’m the pres-
Everyone: NO!
Bush: Aww man.
And so the Agents locked President Bush in the SoaH machine and proceeded to party with Bam Margera and the rest of the CKY crew at Castle Bam. Hyper is seen skating with his beer helmet on.
Hyper: Woah woah wee woah!
Hyper flies off a big ramp and does several flips while drinking from his beer hat, he then makes a perfect landing.
Hyper: Woooo!!!
Bam: And he didn’t spill a single drop.
Dunn: That’s talent.
Zin: I didn’t even know he could skate board.
Neon: He probably doesn’t even know he can.
Bam: So after you guys take the President back what are you going to do next?
Zin: What ever the fuck we want!
Bam: Hey that’s my line jackass!
Bam jumps Zin and starts kicking his ass.
Zin: Ah! Ah! What the hell Bam! What the hell!
Neon: Haha good times. I think we could spend a long time here.
Dunn: Might as well I don’t think anyone will really miss the president if he’s gone a little longer.
Neon: Yeah though I can’t help to think I’ve forgotten something important.
Meanwhile back at the Warehouse.
Super: Ok guys I don’t think the guys are coming back. And there is only one solution I can think of to explain their disappearance.
Nuku: Ah and what’s that?
Super: They must be secret undercover spies who were sent to locate and save the missing president so the world doesn’t end up the way it did in that show we watched on the Sci-Fi channel.
Nuku and CK both stop and stare at Super for a moment.
Nuku and CK: Super, you idiot!
CK: That’s the most ridicules thing I’ve ever heard, ha secret agents!
Nuku: Yeah really Super, do any of those three let alone Hyper strike you as people who could be spies?
Super: Well… you never know.
CK: Yeah and I’m secretly a Chao Pacifist.
Super: Really?
CK: No.
Nuku: Idiot…
And so the day was saved thanks to the