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One day at the CoaP warehouse we find Hyper, Super, and Zin watching Hentai.
Zin: Woo! The new Hentai Channel rocks!
Super: It sure does Zin!
Hyper: Yeah and later tonight the Julie-Su Gone Wild special is on!
Nuku and Mystic walk into the room.
Nuku: Ewww. Do you three watch anything besides Hentai?
Hyper: I like music videos.
Super: Yeah music videos!
Hyper: Super you see the music video for "Bitch" by Dope? It has naked chicks in it!
Mystic: Men...
Just then Ego Dude walks into the room with some papers.
Nuku: What you got there Neon?
Neon: Well I was going through my files and I found a script to an Old Skool CoaP story. It's dated from the early 90's. Though I don’t remember this one. I'm pretty sure it never aired.
Hyper: Who wrote it?
Neon: You did.
Super: Well I guess that explains why it never aired!
Hyper: Screw you Super! Just how many of your scripts got aired as TV shows?
Super: Um...
Hyper: That’s right! None! Zero! You never even wrote any!
Mystic: Calm down Hyper.
Hyper: Sorry...
Hyper lays back in his seat and downs a beer.
Nuku: Why don't you read it Neon?
Neon: Ok. Here we go!
Our story takes place in the SoaH Machine. The CoaP gang is driving along a road in the forest listing to Dope “ Fuck tha Police” on the stereo Super’s Pikmin installed. Nuku is driving with Super riding shotgun. Everyone else is in the back.
Hyper: Fuck um! Fuck the police!
Nuku: Shut up Hyper I’m trying to drive.
Hyper: Fine!
Zin: So where the heck are we going again?
Neon: Were out here in these Spooky Woods seeking adventure and mystery!
CK: Why the hell are we doing that?
Super: Because were the Scooby Doo Detective agency!
Super passes out from drinking too much beer and he falls over on Nuku causing her to lose control of the van.
Nuku: Ahhheeeeey!!!!
She drives off the side of the road and slams into a tree causing Super to crash into the windshield leaving a big dent.
Zin: Is everyone ok?
Nuku: Yeah I am.
CK: Can’t believe Super caused us to crash like that.
Nuku: Yeah it’s something I would expect Hyper to do.
Hyper: It’s something I really wanted to do Nuku.
Super: Wooo! Did you see that crash?
Neon: Idiot…
Hyper: I dunno Super. I’ve seen better. The van is still intact and you could have uprooted a few trees while you were at it. Plus you didn’t manage to spill any beer on Nuku and your head should have been put through the windshield like so.
Hyper bashes his head through the windshield shattering the glass.
Zin: Hyper’s a pro.
Super: Show off!
Neon: Damn it Hyper! Your gonna be paying for that.
Hyper: Whatever.
CK: Nuku try starting the van.
Nuku: Ok.
She turns the key but the engine won’t start.
Nuku: I turned the key but the engine won’t start. Were stuck here guys.
Zin: Were lost in the woods? Damn that sucks.
Neon: Someone should go out and look for help.
Nuku: Who though?
CK: We can do rock paper scissors.
Neon: Ok CK and Hyper can go first.
Hyper + CK: Rock, Paper, Scissors. Shoot!
Hyper throws rock and CK throws paper.
Hyper: Oh yeah! Rock crushes paper! I win!
Zin: Hyper you idiot, rock doesn’t crush paper.
Hyper: Does so!
CK: Dude paper covers rock so I win.
Hyper: How the hell does paper cover rock!?
Neon: That’s the way the game plays you idiot now get out there and find some help.
Hyper: How comes no one else had to play?
Super: Cause we need to stay here and guard the van.
Hyper: Fine…
Hyper leaves the van and walks off into the woods.
Zin: Think we’ll ever see him again?
CK: Doubt it.
Super: Anyone wanna play connect four? Since Hyper is gone we don’t need to worry about him eating the pieces.
Neon: Sure.
A loud scream can be heard coming from the woods.
Nuku: That sounded like Hyper!
Zin: Should we go see if he’s ok?
CK: Nah he’ll be fine.
Nuku glares at CK.
CK: Ok ok! Let’s go.
The CoaP gang all leave the van and go off into the woods in search of Hyper. After they leave a tow truck drives up to the van. It comes to a stop and Cal and two of his henchmen exit.
Cal: Mmmyesss. The CoaP gangs van has broke down in the woods after it crashed! While they are gone you two will make repairs to the van so they can leave.
Henchman 1: Why are we helping them?
Cal: You imbecile! You didn’t let me finish! After your done with the repairs you will attach this van bomb under the van. Then when the CoaP gang get back on the road KABLAM! No more CoaP. Mmmyesss.
Henchman 2: We’ll get right to work boss.
Cal: Mmmyesss! Now I shall proceed to head off into the woods so I can distract CoaP until the repairs are complete!
Cal runs off into the woods as his Henchmen get to work on the van. Meanwhile we cut to the CoaP gang who have found Hyper.
Zin: There he is!
Nuku: Hyper what was wrong?
Hyper: huh?
CK: We heard you screaming you idiot! What for?
Hyper: Oh that! I spilled my beer.
Neon: Hyper, you idiot!
Super: I thought I was the idiot?
CK: Your both idiots. Now can we go back to the damn van?
Nuku: No CK. While were out here we need to go find help.
CK: Whatever, I’m going back.
CK starts to head back to the van.
Nuku: CK get back here!
Neon: Let him go Nuku. We need someone to watch after the van.
Nuku: Fine.
Zin: Let’s go find help now.
Before CoaP has a chance to move Cal pops out of some bushes.
Cal: Mmyessss! I have found you!
Hyper: What the hell do you want?
Cal: I am here to help you of course!
Zin: Ya right, how dumb do we look?
Cal: With or with out counting Hyper?
Zin: Um… with?
Cal: Then you look pretty damn stupid.
Hyper: Hey! You take that back!
Cal: Never!
Neon: Hey hey! What’s this about you helping us?
Cal: Very simple! If Nuku here marries me then I shall help you escape from the woods!
Nuku: Never!
Super: Do we need to wait till after the wedding for you to help us or will you do it right now?
Nuku: I’m not marrying him Super!
Cal: Awww why not?
Zin: Does she really need a reason?
Cal: Um..
Neon: Forget this gang! Let’s split up!
Zin: You mean go back to the van?
Neon: Yeah!
The CoaP gang starts to head back to the van.
Cal: You’ll live to regret this!
Meanwhile we cut back to the van were Cal’s henchmen have just finished fixing the van. They are about to place the van bomb on when CK comes back.
CK: What the hell are you two doing to the van?
Henchman 1: We fixed it.
CK: Really? Gee thanks.
Henchman 2: Yes and now we must place this van bomb underneath the van.
CK: Van bomb yeah say? Let me see that.
CK looks at the bomb.
CK: You guys know what?
Henchman 1: What?
CK: This isn’t a van bomb at all! It’s a tow truck bomb!
Henchman 2: Really?
CK: Yup! Here let me help you guys out.
CK takes the bomb and places it under the tow truck.
CK: There ya go! You’re all set.
Henchman 1: Thank you mister hedgehog.
CK: No prob!
The Henchmen get in the tow truck and drive off. Just then the rest of the CoaP gang come back.
Neon: My van is fixed!
CK: It sure is.
Zin: Sweet now we can go home.
They all get in the van and drive off.
Nuku: Wow the van is working real nice now. It handles like a dream!
Neon: Sweet.
Super: Some one turn the stereo on!
Hyper: Ok.
Hyper turns it on and Dope “ March Of Hope” plays.
Hyper: Wooo!
Meanwhile we find Cal’s henchmen picking up Cal on the side of the road.
Cal: Did you two fix the van and install the van bomb?
Henchman 1: Yes and no.
Cal: What do you mean yes and no?
Henchman 2: Well we fixed the van but the bomb wasn’t a van bomb.
Cal: Then what was it?!?!
Henchman 1: A tow truck bomb.
Cal: Tow truck… bomb?
Just then the entire tow truck explodes and Cal is flung into the air.
Cal: Looks like Team Cal’s blasting off again!!!!
The End
Zin: I don't really remember that one.
Super: Yeah it was kind of lame...
Hyper: Shut up! I'd like to see your write a CoaP story!
Super: ...
Neon: I thought it was ok.
Mystic: Yeah it was pretty funny.
Nuku: Yeah and it was good to be reminded of CK. I think.
Hyper: Yeah and Cal was still trying to marry Nuku!
Nuku glares at Hyper.
Hyper: Eeeep!!!
Nuku starts to chase Hyper around the warehouse as the screen fades out.